Your day today

I’m sure most of you wait for your newspaper for one small column,(For men read 2 small column-adding the model of the day poster) Your Day today – by Pt. Spoilyourday Maharaj or something like that…………….

So do I

But of late I’m not so eager to know how my day’s gonna be, not for the fact that my day actually goes bad, but the newspaper that comes home never gives any hope for me…

Don’t believe me just read what my last week’s predictions looked like.

Monday – Don’t do any thing related to work today, whatever can go against you, will go against you, bosses are wild at you and your colleagues have paid sharp shooters to take you out.

Tuesday – The effects of all the naughty planets planning to push you off your orbit is going to be strong, don’t even think of going back to office, try going to Bermuda’s triangle you may still have a chance of coming out safe.

Wednesday – Any thing that has to do with the word “wed” you should stay away from it your friends are rooting to borrow all your money and never pay back, you make a joke and it turns into a communal clash, and the tax department has planned a Income tax raid on you and only you today. So just survive.

Thursday – Just as the approaching weekend thoughts bring even a semblance of smile, gloom decides into your planetary alignment touch a bike and you’ve lost your arm and ride your bike you get crushed under an oil tanker, you decide

Friday – TGIF – sorry it does not mean what you think – it means “Too God-awful, Its Freakily Frightening”, that sums up the day for you doesn’t it?

Saturday – Saturday fever do you say, fever you’ll get it alright, but most certainly it’s a symptom of something far serious and fatal than anything discovered till day.

Sunday – Just stay away from family and loved ones, your parents are planning to sell you in the flea market, your wife wants to kill you for your insurance money, your children want to kill you and get your property. And remember the Income tax raids, your friends were behind that. Have a great weekend.